Document Type : The scientific research paper
Author
. Associate Professor of Jurisprudence and Principles, University of Tehran, Iran.
Abstract
Highlights
CONCLUSION
Reflecting on the rational and narrative arguments and opinions of Islamic jurists, no specific and clear edict on permission or sanctity has been obtained regarding the meeting of marriage candidates with each other and discussing and deciding whether to agree or reject the marriage. Although it is recommended for the man who is going to marry to see the woman, but there is no explicit edict to meet and talk.
The jurists believe that any seeing and looking at a man and a woman, unconsciously and forcibly, stimulates a man's lust and makes him enjoy the woman. A woman may also be aroused and enjoy in case of looking at a man. According to this view and attitude, some have absolutely forbidden the view of men and women to each other, while others have conditioned the impermissibility of non-mahram men and women looking at each other subject to the existence of "fear and doubt" and the fear of falling into sin of non-religious pleasure.
They have agreed that it is permissible to look at the face and hands up to the wrists if there is certainty about not committing the sin of gratification. On this basis, most jurists believe that looking at the suitor in case of knowledge or the possibility of enjoying the proposee has been allowed by the Shari'ah and it is not considered a sin and they consider the suitor's look permissible. Some, however, have considered the woman's look at the suitor forbidden and haram, whereas others have considered it permissible.
Due to the differences between the jurists, it has been concluded that the edict on the absolute or conditional permission or sanctity of marriage candidates to each other is an ijtihad and inferential edict and is not an explicit and prescribed edict of Shari’ah.
On the other hand, all interactions between men and women that are limited to gratifying and enjoying are far from human behavior. It is not that every look and encounter between men and women, unintentionally and by force, leads to taking pleasure and enjoying. Humans can have all kinds of legal, cultural, scientific, religious, social, political, and similar relationships and interactions with each other, and this relationship cannot be established between people of the same sex in all circumstances; a woman may need to see a man for religious, legal, medical, commercial, and other matters.
By behaving wisely in such needs and communications, how can human beings turn it into an animal behavior which is just enjoying? Marriage is also a wise and prudent decision and action in the destiny of wise people. Marriage is the foundation of a momentous living in a lifetime for both parties. Why build a momentous foundation for life, in which prestige, mental health, economic status of life, socio-scientific status and so on are effected, with the lowest and most ridiculous look and behavior? Why should marriage be limited to hedonistic behavior?
Therefore, because all aspects of human activity such as religious, social, professional, spiritual, prestige and such things are affected in some way by marriage, and in the Shari'ah, the religion of Islam, there is no special view of marriage, that is, it is not said that marriage is a "hedonistic contract" and the enjoyment of a couple from each other; Rather it is possible to achieve human perfection through marriage, and Islam has also considered the sublime aspects of marriage, and did not prohibit marriage candidates from meeting each other to make decisions.
The fatwas issued to ban them from visiting were not based on the nature of marriage, but on the possible side-effects of communication. Although those side-effects have been magnified. Considering the nature of marriage and giving importance and issuing rulings based on the nature of marriage and its moral, human and religious effects, is preferable to considering its possible side-effects. Therefore, the result of the study and research is that not only there is not any ban for marriage candidates to meet each other, considering the nature of marriage and its moral, human, social and religious effects, but also it is recommended to avoid emotional marriage and momentary susceptibility and to think about marriage wisely, consciously, thoughtfully and philosophically, to talk to each other and consult with those wise around them.
To decide to marry each other or to give up getting married wisely so that there would no personality, religious, social, economic, spiritual or similar costs for them. The advice to a wise marriage is to express all the issues of life, that is, to exercise the rights of marriage, to live morally with each other, to forgive and ignore each other’s mistake
Keywords
Article Title [Persian]
Author [Persian]
دیدار داوطلبین ازدواج پیش از عقد نکاح جهت رسیدن به تصمیم قطعی برای ازدواج یا انصراف از آن، چنان در جامعه اسلامی ایران مقبولیت دارد که حتی تصور «منکر» بودن آن نمیشود و متعصَّبترین دیندار نیز، توان نهی آن را ندارد؛ درحالیکه غالب مذاهب فقهی دیدن- بهصورت غافلگیرانه- چهره و دستها تا مچ زن را برای خواستگار جایز و بعضی اجازه دادهاند که زن نیز ظاهر مرد را ببیند مشروط برعدم لذتبردن خواستگار. و چنانچه خارج از اراده، و قهری رخ دهد، بعضی فقط یکبار اینگونه دیدن زن را برای خواستگار، و بعضی چندبار دیدن آن را تجویز نمودهاند. فقیهانی هم بیش از چهره و دستها تا مچ، دیدن اندام زن باوجود پوشش نازک حتّی با رخدادن لذت خواستگار را تجویز کردهاند، اما دیدار و گفتگو را غالب مذاهب منع نموده و بعضی از فقیهان با شرط عدم مفسده مجاز دانستهاند. بررسی آرای همه مذاهب فقهی نشان میدهد که آرای اظهارشده استنباطی و اجتهادی است و حکم مسلّم شرع نیست و مبتنی بر منحصرکردن نکاح به کامجویی و لذتبردن زوجین شده و دیگر جنبههای نکاح را نادیده گرفتهاند و ارتباط زن و مرد را منحصر به رابطه التذاذی دانستهاند. با نقد آرای فقهی و مبانی آن، سرانجام حکم به جواز دیدار و گفتگوی داوطلبان ازدواج تا حدّ تصمیم قطعی منجر به ازدواج یا انصراف از آن را با بیانات شرعی و متون کتاب و سنّت منافی ندانستهاند.
Keywords [Persian]
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